Wednesday, August 03, 2016

BUTTERFLY HONEY!?!

JUST A QUICK POST TO SAY HI!!

Hello beasties!

This is just a quick post to say hello whilst I'm down in Kent... As you may remember I posted early before I left because I wasn't sure what internet access I'd be getting... Well, I'm glad to announce that I do have internet access - although in the evening it completely grinds to a halt; it's amazing at about 3am, however! As long as you don't mind the fire-alarms going off... (This actually happened! Twice!)

I'm having good fun recording the episodes that I am recording of the podcast down here. They'll be a bit different than the ones that you have heard so far... It looks like I'm going to be recording material for three episodes this week. Whilst down here I also got the chance to interview my old friend Elaine about all manner of topics - we weren't able to meet face-to-face, but as we were both off work it became easier to schedule a Skype chat! Good fun - although it may be a while before you hear the result!

Moving on... Here are a few of the photos that I've taken so far,  not too many, so far - but this is only the start! 

I hope you enjoyed those!! There will definitely be more...
 
Coming up in a moment are a number of other photos from July 2016 which don't really belong anywhere else - but include either plants or Deeley-dog... I've also saved a number of other photos from July to go with some of the podcast episodes that are due out over the next few weeks... Talking of podcasts, episode 10 came out just before I went to Kent and episode 11 followed on only a couple of days later - here is all the information that you need to know about how to access them!

THE SHY LIFE PODCAST - 10: BACK IN YETI MANORS...

Here we are for episode TEN - and this really is our longest episode yet!! This time Mr Yeti is back down in Salisbury - visiting friends and family. We meet his old friend Nick Goodman, who has been on the show before (via the telephone!) and they discuss how they met, preserving their films from the 1990s and their latest writing project. You will also receive an audio tour of the village, Yeti Manors, where Shy grew up! All that and we also catch up with his mum who has a strange plant growing in her garden and also tells a story about how Shy was once a naughty yeti. All that and some left-over poems from Mr Yeti's recent London show and we catch up with Yeti Uncle John and Dameus Twinklehorn. There is also a little tune that long-time followers of Mr Yeti may recall! I am aiming to get episode 11 of the show ready before mid-August! Please email me at shyyeti@yahoo.co.uk if you have any comments. The music is by Shy Yeti and Luca. This episode and all contents are Copyright Paul Chandler, 2016. Episode 10 was recorded between the 8th and the 10th July 2016.

THE SHY LIFE PODCAST - 11: OH, JULIE...

Here we are for episode ELEVEN!! This time Mr Yeti is speaking to Julie Howell, who he has known for twenty years... Find out how they met and all about what happened when Julie was briefly Mr Yeti's manager... They also discuss politics, music and pets - and you'll hopefully find it quite an inspiring chat! This episode also features some further poems from Mr Yeti's Poetry CafĂ© show earlier in July 2016. Episode 12 should be ready within the first few days of August! Please email me at shyyeti@yahoo.co.uk if you have any comments. The music is by Shy Yeti and Luca. This episode and all contents are Copyright Paul Chandler, 2016. Episode 11 was recorded between the 8th and the 12th July 2016. As of this episode I am proud to announce that we are now officially part of the Pride48 family of podcasts.

These episodes are available on iTunes, Acast, Podbean and also on Soundcloud at:
 

11: https://soundcloud.com/shyyeti/the-shy-life-podcast-11-oh-julie
 
I'm working away at episode 12 at the moment, so next time I may even have details about that - not to mention more photos from behind the scenes of recording some of these recent episodes. I am also working on another Shy Yeti sketch, but that may not be ready - and if not then I will have a new prose piece instead...

Before I sign off, Deeley wants to say hello...

There we go! He's awfully cute still, isn't he? His mum, Juanita, celebrates her 13th birthday today - whilst Deels will be 12 on the 15th October 2016.
Before I go I have a short piece called , BUTTERFLY HONEY which I wrote on Sunday  24th July 2016, the weekend just before I came away to Kent. It's a little bit surreal - but that's very typical me!! It was kind of inspired by a couple of daft chats with friends - just the idea of other animals deciding to make their own unique variety of honey, some of it rather vile, made me giggle.

More soon!

Yeti hugs,

Paul xx
 
BUTTERFLY HONEY


It was the butterflies who started it...
If the bees can do it then why can't we?
And so the butterflies began to make honey.
Those who tried it actually said that it didn't taste too bad...
After all, the butterflies did hang out in similar places to the bees...
Only they tended to be lazier -
Somewhat more drunken...
They simply didn't have the commitment -
Wafting dizzily from flower to flower; giggling.
Those who tried butterfly honey reported -
That they detected a hint of tequila...
Of maybe even some manner of absinthe flavouring...
It was definitely an acquired taste!

Butterfly honey was all very well -
But suddenly everybody wanted a piece of the action -
From cooing collared doves to the bleatiest of sheep...
From cute and fluffy kittens to brightly feathered cockertoos...
From bad-tempered badgers to boisterous budgerigars...

They were all at it... 

Fox honey.
Toad honey
Cow honey.
Rabbit honey.
Wasp honey. 
Spider honey.
Salamander honey.
Even our local MP managed to excrete a little...
Or was it grease? Was it pure smarm?
I'm not sure I want to know!

As I'm sure you can imagine many of these varieties were not too flavoursome...

All far too...

Twiggy.
Tacky.
Chewy.
Scratchy.
Tickly
Slimy.
Wiggly.
Wobbly. 
Stretchy.
Bobbly.
One or two...
Somewhat beguiling...
But most were simply...
Barf-inducing...
Stomach swirling...
Vomit-encouraging...

Something for everyone.
But only if one be a masochist...
It was all a little half-hearted after that...
Soon after they all began to give up their individual honey making businesses...
Even the Badgers...
Returning to their incomplete crossword puzzles...
Even the burping toads and the rudely farting foxes -
Returned to their unfinished games of Happy Families and gin rummy respectively...
Even the butterflies got tired of making it -
Preferring just to hang absentmindedly from flowers listening to bad hair metal.

For they all knew the truth...
There was no denying it...
Only the bees had the true recipe to honey -
They would keep it to themselves too...

And all I can say to that is...

Sweet.

This post and all contents are Copyright Paul Chandler, 2016.

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