Friday, May 03, 2002

Lunch with Fatima was splendid! She has persuaded me to share Herbal Tea with you... Do you take sugar?
This really is an exclusive - I don't know what my publishers will say!

HERBAL TEABAGS.

Herbal teabags -
Tasty brews…
She drinks them early -
Reads the news!
Sometimes bitter -
Hides the smell…
Earl Grey!
(Not Poison!!)
Just as well!
Pours another -
Fruity taste!
No need to sweeten -
What a waste!
Her neighbour kind -
At Christmas time…
Herbal tea-bags -
"Hint of Lime!"
Or so he said -
When sampled -
ODD!
Old grass cuttings!
CHEEKY SOD!!!

Hello! I've just heard from my dear 2nd-Father, Mr Andrex Trowby who I am meeting tomorrow. He wishes us well with this venture and I may ask for his advice in future. My dearest 2nd-Mother Lisandra Park is also joining us as we make a trip across London to visit some needy Science Fiction fans who are desparate for our attention. I do apologise if I don't get to make many entries over this forthcoming Bank Holiday - but I'm sure you will understand - and I promise to update you on events as soon as humanly possible! I have a picnic to go to on sunday at which I will be giving an exclusive reading of Herbal Tea and then a mysterious friend of mine is coming to visit on the Monday! It'll be ever-so-jolly! :)

Anyhew - I must off now - I have a luncheon appointment with my lovely and dear fortune-telling friend Ms Fatima in the luxurious haven that is Belgrave Square Gardens. Before I go - Fatima has a piece of advice for you all...

NEVER STEAL ANOTHER MAN'S RHUBARB!

Wise words indeed!

You wonderful people!
Forgot to mention that I wrote a new poetic masterpiece on the Express Train to Guildford yesterday. It's called Herbal Tea - and I might share it with you later.
For now though - another recent and unpublished ditty - entitled :

BALLAD OF A CHILD ACTOR.


They are terribly unprofessional -
These older acting types…
They call each other "LOVEY!",
And they're always smoking pipes!
Harping on 'bout Chaucer -
And someone called "THE BARD"!?!
"I can't abide the Sonnets -
His Iambic Meter jarred!"
I really cannot stand it -
When they gently pat my head -
"Are you doing OK sonny?"
Patronise me?
OH, DROP DEAD!
They say don't act with children -
With a beast daren't share the stage -
But t'is he lusting lead ladies -
Leery drunkard!
Six times my age!
So be it - moan about us!
But Child Actors do have rights!
We expect a proper dinner -
And refuse to dress in tights!
"Alas, alas poor Yorik!"
"What was my line again?!
These professionals are hopeless!
Fluffing speech - quite dead of brain!
Oh - they're such a band of ninnies!
Drama queens so O.T.T!
More wooden than the scene-ry,
But please don't go quoting me!
They have hissy fits and tantrums -
Storm out moody - cannot wait!
Think it's fine to sob in corners -
I cry too - but then - I'M EIGHT!!
"I'm finding this line tricky…"
WELL - WHY DON'T YOU JUST TRY HARDER!?
I learnt my part unaided -
Whilst…
You guys "did time" at R.A.D.A.!
Well - hey - children rule the roost now -
So "get used"!
In neat queues totter…
And I'll see what I can do for you…
BIT PARTS IN -
HARRY POTTER!!!

Good morning good people... I do hope you had a merry old evening. I was with "the wife" - the darling Josette in a theatre in Guildford purusing a play by the splendid Mr Alan Bennett. Play of note was called Single Spies and had the most wonderful Lisa Goddard and the truly exceptional Mr Robert Powell in the leading roles. As a result my darling Josette left the theatre speaking in an odd Russian dialect. I do hope she's okay - she's gone back to the boyfriend now and I don't expect to see her for several weeks.

Thursday, May 02, 2002

Here is a poem...

There was a young man from Nantucket,
Who kept his wife's head in a bucket...
It would bob up and down -
With never a frown...
And now and again he would duck it! :)

I think that's a lovely and moving effort...

Possibly.

More soon darlin's!

Da Poet

Well now - I think I should share a poem with the crowds out there...
I've already heard from one Ms Fatima the Fantabulous who purchased my first book of poems...
She writes as follows : "The quality of your poetry was very consistent throughout the volume... I didn't like it much..."
Well now - you can't please everyone!
Thanks for writing in Fatima.
Now where did I put those new ditties... I can't be doing without me ditties... :)
See ya's.

Da Poet.

THE FIRST POST...

This is fab... I wonder what happens if I tweak this bit! WAHEY!